I do not consider myself a control freak. (My boys may have a different view on this statement). However, I will admit that control, or lack of control, is something I have absolutely struggled with. It is an ongoing battle that I have been intentionally working on over the past couple of years. When I say “working” on it I mean working on giving it up. Letting it go. Releasing control.
I know there are many of you out there with the same struggle. If you have children it can be especially hard. I have a little more hindsight on this issue now as I’ve been on both ends. I’ve been the child bending to the wishes and desires of my parents, and then attempting to be that parent who tries to steer children in a particular way. As our children get older and more independent it can become a battle. As we adults get older, more independent and, hopefully, wiser, we realize the battle needs to be different so that the hold may become different.
I can be a really slow learner. It’s taken me far longer than necessary to finally realize that it does not matter what I do to try to control any given situation, how hard I work for an outcome, how hard I try to hold on, it simply is not up to me. Usually I have no control. I can honestly say that this has been a very bitter pill to swallow at times. After sooooo many days and nights banging my head against a wall, it has sunk in and I have finally learned to let go. I cannot control what others do or what is going on around me, whether in my own little world, or the world at large.
This “letting go” lesson has been a big gift during this quarantine season. I have not been sitting around stewing and wringing my hands (thankfully). If we ever thought we had any control in this world then this dang virus ought to absolutely shut that notion down. For me, the answer is to do what I can each day. I can control the things I should and not waste my time and energy on the things faaarrr beyond my reach. Continue moving forward, even if it is only in my own little space, reaching out to a smaller little circle, and allowing the One above who actually does have the control to work His magic.
Life has a funny way of teaching us and showing us so many things. One that I keep learning again and again is that it is not my plan and I have no control. You’d think I’d have gotten that one by now and could get an A on that lesson.
Giving up control brings me to this yoga class. What better form of exercise to teach us that? Sometimes we just cannot control what our body does or does not allow. Other times it is best to just let it go and release it to go as far as it can.
Here is another live class from our socially distant workouts. I hope you enjoy. Again, please mute unless you really want to feel as if you are with us!
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