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Marla Deen

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On Being an Introvert and 10 seconds to Loving-Kindness

August 25, 2017 by Marla-Deen Brooks Leave a Comment

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It’s Friday afternoon and I’m completely wallowing in a complete bout of introvert-ism.  I’m not really sure if wallowing or introvert-ism are actually words, but they seemed to fit the bill here.  I am one of those secret introverts.  Don’t get me wrong – I LOVE people and listening to their stories, learning what I can and the energy from being and sharing.  But sometimes between lots of people time I relish the extravagance of a little solitary time.

My morning was spent teaching a really high energy strength class, staying after for a Pilates class and then meeting with a friend for lunch.  My evening will be in the midst of a fun Friday Night light football game for my Third Son.  In between all of this I have been working at home, basically alone with my three dogs.  I am not complaining.

 

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This is how one spent the afternoon . . . on our bed that he had not gotten permission to use!

This is what I wanted to share today.  I’ve mentioned at some point that I have recently been following Tim Ferriss (known for The Four Hour Workweek and The Four Hour Body).  I always like his 5 Bullet Fridays where he shares his top five things of the week, including a book he is reading, a favorite Instagram post, a quote he is pondering and a podcast.  Recently, I mentioned or recommended his book, Tools of Titans to The Husband.  I rarely do this with a book I have not read.  However, I felt like it would be something that could interest him.  Now, let me remind you . . . I am a self-proclaimed self-help book nerd.  I love them for some reason.  Even if I don’t particularly agree with all that is in the book, or if they are even a little too “woo woo” for me, I can still find some little nugget to use or tuck away.  My Husband finds  my penchant for self-help not so very interesting, to say the least.  So, I was quite surprised this afternoon when he came home with a copy of the book . . . for me.  And, even more interesting, said that he had read parts of the book and liked it.  He also made the statement that while reading it, thought to himself how much I would love it.

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I am telling you he was right.  (Yes, that pains me to write those words for all creation to see and have an actual record) .  Within the first 5 minutes of merely flipping open and Tools of Titans, I found something so positive and uplifting that I have to share here.

I randomly opened the book to page 57 and noticed the bottom of the page listed the following:

2.  Loving-Kindness and the Happiest Day in 7 Years

Now be honest,  doesn’t that intrigue you?

Here’s the jest of this.  Ferriss says he often guides a 10-second exercise in many of his public talks.  He tells the audience to identify two people in the room and simply think, “I wish for this person to be happy, and I wish for that person to be happy.”  Basically, it’s only a 10-second thing – nothing else.  Ferriss says that every time he does this, the people are happy and smiling and happier than they were 10 seconds earlier.  He terms this the joy of loving-kindness.

I can see the benefit in this.  It is the same as giving a gift.  Being the giver gives us such a greater sense of happiness than being the taker.  So, basically, you are giving something away (your 10 seconds and your good will) pain-free and reaping all the benefit.  The recipients need never know.

He gave a great example of the benefits of his loving-kindness.  He described giving a talk over two days and introducing this 10 second exercise to the audience.  Since he would see the audience the following night, he instructed them to practice this at work the next day. He told them to do it once an hour, every hour, randomly identifying different people each time.  This is such a small and private thing that no one need ever know what is going on.  Ferriss said that he received an email from one of the audience members about her experience.  She had been absolutely miserable in her job.  After attending his talk, going to work and doing the homework on Tuesday, she said that Tuesday was her happiest day in seven years.

Wow.  That’s pretty cool.  I’m thinking if all I’m losing is 10 seconds every hour it’s definitely worth a try!

 

So, that was just the first time randomly opening the book! Can’t wait to actually read the book  . . . .

Enjoy Your Day!

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Filed Under: General, General Post, Motivation Tagged With: dogs, Fridays, happiness, introvert, joy, Tim Ferriss, Tools of Titans

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