Something Profoud (or things I hear my mother saying)

My Mom is sick.  It’s okay.  She’s been sick before, really sick.  She has an incredibly strong spirit so we never count her out.  The Husband calls her a Steel Magnolia and he’s exactly right.  She’s strong, willful,  and has this uncanny way of getting folks to do exactly what she wants, and when she wants, even if it makes no sense at all.  She has recently had nurses giving her back rubs.  They say in their 25 years of nursing they have never done that for patients.  I do not have that gift.  She has always been a no-nonsense kind of mom. She doesn’t do silly, or fluff.  She reminds me of Kelly Corrigan’s mom in her books, The Middle Place and Glitter and Gold.  I feel a kindred spirit with Kelly in her relatonship with her mother. My mom and I weren’t the type to gush over the latest fashion or get mani and pedis together.  I wouldn’t have revealed my most recent crush to her or anything she might think frivilous. Things did change as we got older and I became a mother.  She softened and relaxed a little more.  She has recently talked about her latest pair of boots, leggings or haircut with me and would surprise me with cute new outfits.  She seemed to enjoy a little bit of fluff.  While she may not have been the “one of the girls” kinds of moms, she did plenty of other things that were good for me.  What she’s always done is love me and support me.  She’s always encouraged me to be more and do more and to go and see.  She’s always given me good, sound advice.  She’s let me lean on her and cry to her.  What was a little “tough” love when I was younger turned into a sturdy, reliable presence.  

Yesterday, as I was talking to her she said she wished she had something profound to tell me.  I told her she had been telling me many profound things for years.  She has always been that constant voice in my ear – often providing good advice, sometimes nagging, and other times saying just the right thing.  Here are a few of Mama’s words in my ear.  I wonder if any are familiar to you, too.

*  But by the grace of God there go I.

*  Always tell the truth.  You’ll get in less trouble.

*  Always wear clean underwear.  You never know if you might get in a wreck.

*  Make sure you respect him.

*  Always be careful of what you do.  You never know who might be watching.

*  Put on some lipstick.

*  Get your hair out of your eyes.

*  One thing no one can take away from you is your education.

*  Make sure you can support yourself.

*  If you lose your reputation you may never get it back.

*  Roses take a lot of work, patience and fertilizer.

*  Babies don’t come with instruction books on their bottoms.  We do the best we can.

*  Everything tastes better with a little pepper.

*  If possible, make it yourself.

*  Stand up straight.

*  Take trips with your husband.

*  You can always trust me.  I have your best interest at heart.  I’m the one person who will never be   jealous of you or will lie to you. 

*  You are so pretty.

*  Don’t wear yellow or orange.  You look better in colors.

*  It’s not our plan.  It’s all in His hands.

* Family is more important than anything else.

 Those are the top things that pop into my mind on a weekly and daily basis.  Most of these are really good – except I do like wearing orange . . . I am sure there are others and I’ve learned many, many other lessons from my mother.  Some doing with cooking, gardening, housekeeping, child rearing, handling a high maintenance husband, and some of what not  to do for your best health.  All in all it’s been a good relationship and one I feel blessed to have.  
As Mother’s Day approaches I am wishing my own mom an early Happy Mother’s Day and appreciating all of the well meaning help, hints, nags, aggravation and love!