a. I don’t know the answer to
b. I don’t want to know the answer to; or
c. I know the answer to but don’t want to share with him.
So, with this question, I wanted to tell him wholeheartedly and emphatically “NO”, but I wasn’t really sure. I don’t feel like I am middle-aged. I don’t feel like those “middle aged women” I knew when I was young. I don’t dress like I am middle-aged. (not that I dress like a twenty-something either) and I work really hard at not yet looking middle-aged. (yes, I am now admitting to some vanity on this issue). However, I cannot ignore my age and I’m likely a wee bit older than a bunch of those other Healthy Living Bloggers out there.
In fact, today begins a big month in our family. In February we celebrated my daddy’s birthday. We celebrate Valentine’s Day. We celebrate my husband’s birthday. This year, on my husband’s birthday, we will also celebrate the first year’s anniversary of my daddy’s death. So, I am hoping to make it a much happier birthday for him this year. Then, a few days later, I will have a birthday. This year will put me slap dab in the middle forties. I’m not exactly thrilled about this impending number. So, if middle-aged is some designated number, it might be 45, right? I mean, that would make sense. If our lifespan is on average 80 years, I am definitely in the middle of it. That would mean I actually am middle-aged. I’m not the young mom anymore.
I guess that could sum it up. That does mean that I am middle-aged now, doesn’t it? I will try to not let this skew my view of my age and my self now that I have just reached this discovery. I still have a ridiculous amount of energy on most days, and will continue to be accused of being “perky” and will keep on keeping on to be strong, fit, healthy and not worrying about the number on my drivers license. Or the crows feet beginning to creep around the eyes . . .
What does middle age really mean? Is it just a number? Is it a mindset?
Can you make me feel better about this?